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March 1999
March 2, 1999 I have felt depressed all day. I don't know why. The sun has been shining, life seems to be going well yet I feel depressed, lethargic, and lonely. I really haven't done anything today and my home is a mess -- the kitchen needs to be cleaned, the playroom needs to be picked up, and laundry needs to be done, yet I can't seem to motivate myself into doing the work. I do not often have days like this but when I do I feel as if I will never recover, if it wasn't for Wild Child I wouldn't get out of the bed on days like this. The house in the mountains sold! I am excited about that. We sold it below the fair market value and I regret that but at least I will be making a nice little penny off of the sell. The guy doesn't want to close until the beginning of the vacation season, which is April 26, so that means two months of waiting for the money. We looked at neighborhoods again this past weekend. We found a floor plan we really like and would like to build but the price is a little more then we anticipated. Interest rates are going up and the builder is pressuring us to make a decision. I don't like to feel rushed into decisions even if it is something I want to do. E--- got a job at Burger King being an Assistant Manager. She spent all of her rent money and had to call her parents and beg them to pay the rent. Her father agreed to pay it but said he was sending the check directly to the apartment complex. She was complaining about not having childcare to me and said she couldn't find anyone for this weekend. I didn't offer to watch her kid even though I know that is what she was hinting at. She was acting really beserk this past weekend so I suggested she let her son go live with his father. I personally believe the kid would be better off with his Dad especially since she is mentally ill and really needs to work on getting well, not to mention she is a tad irresponsible. I often think I should call Spawn of Satan's father and tell him what has been going on but I feel I would be betraying her. I will ponder doing this some more. She discussed giving her EX their son but her parents begged her not too and said they would fork out any kind of money to her so she could keep him. I wonder if this is a ploy to bleed more money out of her parents. If only her Ex new how ill she was and the things she has been doing the last few months. In the mean time I guess I'm going to try and pull my act together. Hopefully tonight I can get out of this lazy, depressd feeling and get some work done.
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