Confessions of no god I wonder how affected my child will be, being raised without a god
or a religion. Living in the south, it seems like everyone is a Christian or holds some
Judeo-Christian beliefs.
We live in a neighborhood where many of the neighbors
profess to be Christians and are raising their children in church. The Beaters are
Seventh-day Adventist. They attend church on Saturday, keep kosher, and are devout. I
often hear a touch of elitism in Mrs. Beater's voice when she talks to me about other
denominations and other families. I was up front with her from the get go and told her
that we were not Christians and that we were not raising our child in a Christian home.
You can imagine the look on her face the day I told her.
I am becoming bolder and more outspoken with my beliefs. I
am finding it easier to say "I am not a Christian," to those around me. The fear
of rejection or being ostracized is still there, but I feel liberated knowing that I do
not have to hide behind my unbelief. It has been easier telling my friends, who either
understand or think I am going through a phase. I haven't told my family yet, except for
my sister who shares in my doubt and disbelief.
Jeff is content keeping it from our families. He sees no
need in them knowing that we have chosen not to raise Elizabeth in church or a specific
religion. He will not admit it but he doesn't want to hear the backlash of his southern
Baptist family and the proselytizing.I know my father is going to be disappointed and may
even cry. Jeff's mother will also be deeply affected. I'm sure she will shed some tears,
tell everyone at the church, and beg us to change our minds. I'm not so worried about my
Aunt Cindy because she has more universalism views and is liberal, and I am positive that
when she comes to visit in October that I am going to tell her.
I feel relieved that my mother is not here to hear my
thoughts and feelings on Christianity, my doubt in god, and my total disbelief in the
bible. She was such a devout Christian. I know she would be devastated and heart broken. I
think about this all the time. I still feel like I am living up to her expectations and I
can picture her face with such a disapproving look.
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